


Circled Sun

by KittenWolf29



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Boys Kissing, Happy Ending, Love, M/M, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-05-14 14:05:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5747263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittenWolf29/pseuds/KittenWolf29
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary:  It's so hard to move forward when your everything dies…, even if you know that someday you'll find him again.  A story of Goku needing his Sanzo and Sanzo making it clear that he had no wish to be pined over.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Circled Sun

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Saiyuki.  
> Uh, it's been awhile and I'm not sure when I'll write next, just doin' what I wanna and what I feel like doing... if that doesn't sound too selfish.  
> Oh, and I hope whoever reads this likes it... since I wrote it awhile ago and just never posted it, until now.

Sanzo was shaking, though not in fear or cold or anything else but old age. Indeed, he could hardly move and his body was so old and frail that he couldn't move without some fine trembling going on.

Gripping Goku's hand tightly, he whispered to the inconsolable saru softly.

“I'll find you. I promise, Goku, just call me and I'll find you.”

And with shaking arms Sanzo wrapped them around Goku, who leaned down, and kissed him goodbye with salty tears running down his face.

Goku felt the life, the eternal warmth!, drain from his sun… and something inside of him shattered and he knew there would be no hope of resurrecting his heart until he saw his precious sun again.

 

The months passed into years which passed into decades which passed into centuries as the seasons rotated again and again endlessly. And still, Goku searched for the one who would bring light and warmth back into his life.

One day he was sitting up a tree in a city in which he'd forgotten the name, worn out by going yet another day just going through the motions, no matter how cheerful he forced himself to be, and always waiting for his sun to rise again.

He'd get back up again, of course he would, always… but just not right now. Right now, he wanted to be without people surrounding him all the time while he still felt so alone and hear the sounds of life all around him, feel the wind flowing through his hair and listen for his sun that was not yet out in this world…, but could someday be.

All of a sudden, Goku's entire being seemed to still in a breathless moment as he felt something he hadn't felt in ages, a feeling of warmth flowing into his very being. A warmth that he hadn't felt in so very long and that could only belong… to his sun, finally being reborn once more.

Utter joy and exhilaration filled Goku at this realization and he jubilantly jumped down from the tree he'd been sitting in as he literally bounced off in the direction of his apartment.

It was time to renew his search, this time with the confirmed knowledge that he would finally meet his sun again after all this never-ending time without him.

Beaming at everyone that passed him without a hint of self-consciousness, Goku looked forward with a light in his eyes that had been missing for far too long.

 

It had been fifteen and some long years since he'd first felt that warmth seeping into him, and though it hadn't faded, Goku was getting very impatient to find his Sanzo.

In yet another city in which he didn't know the name of, Goku walked aimlessly around. Until, he heard a voice that pierced through his core, directly behind him.

“Where the fuck have you been, saru?! I got tired of waiting for your idiotic self to find me.”

Swiftly whirling around, Goku beheld Sanzo… standing right in front of him, looking young and beautiful and healthy. The sunlight haloing his golden hair and violet eyes, which gazed up at him forcefully, Sanzo looked exactly like Goku remembered him… so very long ago.

Tears brimming in his eyes, Goku took a disbelieving step towards his sun, whispering Sanzo's name over and over again in a choked voice.

With an exasperated roll of his eyes, Sanzo was the one to make the first move as he smoothly stepped up to Goku and took his tearful face in his hands, which were smaller than they'd been before thanks to Goku growing and he being slightly smaller since he was a teenager again!, and leaned up to kiss his saru like he'd never been gone in the first place.

Answering in a speed of the truly desperate, Goku wrapped his arms around Sanzo and kissed him back fervently, mapping out his sun's slightly different taste.

They finally broke apart when their lungs demanded air, and with gasping pants, Sanzo told Goku in a brusque tenderness.

“You better have lived your life with your stupid, happy smile or I'll kill your dumb saru self!”

At this question dressed up in a command, Goku started fidgeting. Because, while he'd lived and traveled and smiled and ate…, he knew that he'd been aimless and hollow in the intervening years. It had hurt too much sometimes to so much as to breathe and he knew that Sanzo was gonna be pissed at him for allowing himself to pine away.

Sanzo's eyes narrowed in suspicion when his saru kept quiet and fidgeted nervously in front of him. So, he'd been right, the idiot had been moping after him for all these long years.

Angry, but unsurprised, Sanzo whacked Goku over the hand with his fist… as he didn't have a harisan with him right now. He'd get one soon, since obviously his slow saru needed to be whacked into existence.

“I'm sorry, Sanzo. I- I did a lot of interestin' things that were cool… but I missed ya so, so much, it felt like an empty hole that just got bigger an' bigger every single day.” Goku attempted to explain, dejectedly.

Glowering at Goku, Sanzo snapped out irritably.

“I don't give a damn about how hard it was without me, saru! You live your life and enjoy it, don't waste your fucking life pining away for me. You do this next time or I'll make damn sure you won't be touching me for a long fucking time!” 

Gulping anxiously, because he could hear the candid truth in those words, Goku nodded his head hurriedly, squeaking out, fervidly.

“I'll do better, I promise, Sanzo.” 

Goku hesitated because he wanted to say something, but he really didn't want to piss off Sanzo anymore than he already was.

Accurately reading what was on Goku's expressive face, Sanzo just sighed wearily and said.

“Just spit it out, saru. I don't have my gun with me right now, so I won't shoot you for saying anything stupid… yet.”

Nodding somewhat apprehensively, Goku nevertheless spoke with a sincere, frank tone of voice.

“Okay. I will do better next time…, but I'll always miss you, Sanzo. It'll always feel like a giant hole inside of me whenever I'm without ya. I'll always wanna be with you an' I'll never feel complete without ya by my side. I'll live my life without ya cuz I hafta, but I'll always need an' want you right next to me… forever. An' I'll always, always look for ya when I feel you. Your my sun.”

Unreadable violet eyes gazed at Goku thoughtfully. The itan squirmed where he stood, waiting for Sanzo to say something. So, when he spoke, Goku couldn't stop himself from jumping a little.

“Fine. Have it your way. Just live your damn life. One more thing, you won't have to be the one to look for me, if I'm the one to find you first, saru!”

And with that, Sanzo grabbed Goku once more and kissed him firmly, passionately as if he were asserting that he was there now and wasn't going anywhere. 

 

End.


End file.
